Atomic fun

Number one
An atom walks into a bar looking depressed.
The bartender asked "What's wrong"?
The Atom replied "I just lost an electron".
Bartender asks, "Are you sure".
The Atom says "I'm positive".

Number two
A proton, neutron, and electron went out to dinner. After the meal, the waiter brings the bill to the proton and the electron. The neutron asks the waiter, "Why don't I get a bill?" The waiter explained to the neutron, "For you, there's no charge!"